[elkguide]

TOP 17 FATAL THINGS TO SAY IF YOUR WIFE IS PREGNANT




17. I finished the Oreos.

16. Not to imply anything but.... I don't think that the kid weighs 40 pounds.

15. You know, looking at her, you'd never guess that Pamela Lee had a baby.

14. I sure hope that your thighs aren't going to stay that flabby forever.

13. Well, could they induce labor? The Super Bowl is the 7th.

12. Darned if you aren't 5 pounds away from a visit by that Richard Simmons fellow.

11. Fred at the office passed a stone the size of a pea. Man, that's got to hurt.

10. Whoa! For a minute there I thought that I woke up next to Willard Scott.

9. I'm jealous. Why can't men experience childbirth?

8. Are your ankles supposed to look like that?

7. Get your own ice cream.

6. Geez, you're awfully puffy looking today.

5. Got milk?

4. Maybe we should name the baby after my secretary, Buffy.

3. Man! That rose tattoo on your hip has to be the size of Madagascar!

2. Retaining water? Yeah, like the Hoover Dam retains water!



1. You don't have the guts to pull that trigger!

 

[govtrapper]

Dang I wonder how many have actually said some of this stuff

Sent from my SM-G928V using Tapatalk

 

[JPW77]

How many times did you nearly escape death Elk?

 

[jrogers]

Much needed lists for us right now. Good thing I didn't finish off the oreos

 

[Trial153]

1a. Who's the father ?

 

[Alislly]

You should always be positive about your girlfriend's pregnancy.

 

[Hodgfrog]

It seems to me that there is nothing more beautiful than the figure of your pregnant wife. It's so beautiful to look at a big belly and realize that your child is there. I don't understand those husbands who get divorced when they find out about their wife's pregnancy. It seems to me that such men are just cowards. Many divorces occur due to premature pregnancy. I read at https://breakupangels.com/divorce-rate-changes-over-time / that the divorce rate has increased in recent years. The most common cause of divorce is pregnancy.